What does EMDR stand for?

Eye Movement– It appears that the beneficial effects are facilitated by the alternating stimulation of the right and left hemispheres of the brain. Eye movements accomplish this, as do bilateral alternating taps or tones.
Desensitization– Refers to the removal of the emotional disturbance associated with a traumatic memory.
Reprocessing– refers to the replacement of the unhealthy, negative beliefs associated with traumatic memories, with more healthy positive beliefs.

EMDR is a procedure that is used in psychotherapy to help you reduce the impact of experiences from the past that intrudes on your everyday life. Usually these experiences from the past involve a significant incident- can be defined as a trauma- such as an assault, abuse, accident, or natural disaster to name a few.

Since the first published EMDR research study done by its developer, Dr. Shapiro in 1989, EMDR has continued to evolve to include contributions made by world therapists and researchers, and to incorporate key elements of multiple psychotherapeutic approaches. Thus far, EMDR has helped approximately 2 million clients find relief from a great variety of psychological distresses.

How does it work?

EMDR is useful in treating the two types of trauma; Capital “T” traumas and little “t” traumas. Big “T” traumas are considered very disturbing events such as being a victim of a serious crime, military combat, sexual assault, or having the experience of losing a loved one such as a spouse, a parent or a child. Little “t” traumas are the smaller everyday chronic upsets, such as daily negative childhood messages or abuse, which can lead to the formation of unhealthy self-concepts and low self-esteem. For example, a child may grow up believing that they are not good enough, that they are unlovable, or that they are truly all alone- all very painful self-concepts. Naturally, with such unhealthy beliefs, a person’s life may have added challenges in all of its aspects, especially evident in our relationships with others.

It seems that the mind can heal itself naturally in the same way as the body does. EMDR can be approached through eye movements as well as gentle tapping, or sounds from ear to ear. The key is to alternate stimulation between the two sides of the brain.

A new year does symbolize a passing of time and can be an appropriate time for reflection as well as goal setting. That said, we do not need to prescribe to what the media or society is fixated on. A recent positing that caught my eye that I felt had a good reflection on the new year included the following:

1. Guard your time
2. Let kindness rule
3. Create good habits
4. Choose to focus on the good
5. Start each day with goals
6. Find the best in others
7. Be the best version of you
8. Believe anything is possible

I appreciated this posting (taken from rachelgadiel.com) as it does not compare one person or life position to another or indicate that there is a level to which we need to achieve- it simply outlines some measures that we can follow (if we choose to) to improve our lives in some small ways, by our own definitions.

In counselling, success is marked by individual definitions and small tangible goals are often set to determine how work is progressing. Similar to the list above, counselling is not about comparison or the measure of ones achievement but more specifically personal growth and healing.  Although many people have a few goals or areas that they wish to focus, it is suggested that one area is highlighted at a time that they wish to focus on and therefore it can be easier to manage the struggle as well as see the positive shifts and personal development.

“I wish I would have started this journey long ago, I do not know why I put it off for so long.” and, “I feel so much better every time I come see you, It is so nice to be open and talk to someone who is listening to me.”

Here are some things to consider when looking for a counsellor and initiating therapy:

• Do some research and choose someone you think you might connect with but go in with an open mind and see if you feel a connection. This is very important. It is ok to decide you want to try someone else, therapy is about YOU and not about pleasing the counsellor.
• Find a qualified professional that focuses on what you want to address. Counsellors have different experiences and interests- it is best that you find a therapist that is a good match, ask them if they will provide a free consultation to see you both think that they are qualified to help you through your struggle.
• Only attend therapy if you want to, not because someone told you that they are going to therapy and think you should too. Everyone is different and needs support at different times in their life for different reasons.
• Try to be patient with the counselling process and remember that like everything in life, therapy has its ups and downs. Some sessions will be very helpful and other sessions will be difficult and potentially upsetting. Be open and honest with your counsellor as to how you feel and how the process is going. This will ensure the best possible outcome for you.
• Its hard to find the “right time” to start therapy. There are many bumps in the road of life and if we waited for a calm time that might never happen. If you are contemplating therapy it is a good idea to start to look into options and consult a few professionals. If you start therapy and decide that you are not ready then it is ok to stop and then start again when you are ready.
• Therapy is not a cure for something but more of a journey to get you on a better path. Many things can assist you in life to be healthier and although mental health is vital for growth and development, physical health including diet and exercise as well as positive motivators i.e.) goals, employment, children- also play significant roles.

I offer a free 15 minute consultation so contact me anytime if you have questions and want to see if I might be the right counsellor for you.

“Happiness is an inside job” – William Arthur Ward